Thursday, April 20, 2006

The Waiting Game

So, sometimes I get tired of things. I figure it's just a natural thing for me, but it might seem weird to others. For some time I don't think about the reality of my situation and I just let things happen as they do and I try to enjoy things as they are.

Then, things become clear to me and I'm brought back down to earth as though I'm some ice chunk in San Francisco.

Through the holiday season, I was under the impression that my girlfriend would have her divorce finalized and her house on the market by the time the summer rolled around and now it's clear that things are progressing at a snails pace, even slower than I ever thought it would. It's upsetting. It makes me wonder what the hell I'm doing and I try my best to keep from feeling like I'm a dolt just sitting here waiting for things to happen. Once again, I'm not familiar with being put in a spot where I can't do anything to help things along. I'm at the mercy of my girlfriend's procrastination, her husband's idiocy, and their lawyers "charge a minute" attitude.

Apart from feeling like I'm part of the reason my girlfriend is "missing" her children growing up, I feel like I'm in a position to be a part of the children's lives too, and I'm missing my time with the children because of all these "procedures".

I don't know what to do. Of course, I'm in love and I really enjoy my girlfriend, the children and her family. I just don't like feeling resentment towards what I'm going through and I don't know exactly how I'll feel when things are cleared up, but it will definitely be another huge weight off my shoulders.

I sit and wait...

UPDATE: The sharpie marker i used to remove the BITCH comment from the sign yesterday must have been faulty, because the marker was washed off. I thought that marker was permanent on everything. I want my money back.

Today i will print off my own "human friendly" sign and simply put it up over the BITCH sign.



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