Saturday, April 01, 2006

The Dating Mother

Geez, this is weird. I had to be aware that my mother would be dating again after divorcing my father, but it's still weird to see her dating. She's been with a few men since my father and that's not something I worry about really, she's human and after making a mistake worthy of a divorce, I completely expect her to take her time. She's doesn't have the keenest eye, but then again, who does?

These days, she's walking the earth in the guise of a teenage girl, "gaga" as they say and doing what you would expect a youngster in love to be doing. In one way, it's great that she's found someone this time that has a stable life and seems to have his head on straight enough not to want to "move in" after knowing her for just a little while.

Last weekend I vocalized for the first time my feelings towards my parent's divorce. I think for years I've thought that my mother didn't put enough into trying to fix her marriage. Of course I don't know every detail about my parent's relationship, other than realizing when they couldn't speak to each other any longer, the divorce was the right thing for everyone involved. The thing that sticks in my mind, is that my father was desperate towards the end to make things right and he seemed to be reaching out for help from the family and his wife to open some kind of communication and all I remember is my mother clamming up and turning away any effort of his.

Now I hear about all these crazy things that my father would do to her and how he would supposedly "mentally abuse" her, but that's her point of view and trust me when I say, when it comes to dishing out mental abuse, she could write a manual. I guess though, I've been feeling sour towards her for years about this. Nothing too terrible that I won't let it go, but when these feelings are so far in the back of your mind, you need to achieve a point in time when the thoughts come to the forefront, allowing you to deal with them.

Tonight, I go out to a nice dinner with my girlfriend, for our one year anniversary. I think I'll take her to the Spaghetti Factory. Time to eat the Italiano... food, that is.



Blogger Leazwell said...

Noonz, this is so cliche but it takes two. Perhaps by the time your father snapped out of it your mother's feelings had been bashed beyond ressurecting. But I'm not so sure I believe feelings are beyond that if two people really loved each other in the beginning. My marriage is a bust but thankfully their are no kids. Can we come back, nah, because we married for all the wrong reasons. Will we divorce, no, mostly due to financial issues. If there is any, I mean any doubt, no matter how microscopic it may seem, don't get married.

7:43 PM  

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